Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
