ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize