he shaved USA in his pubs
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
