she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
