ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
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