ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
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