people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
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