we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize