dude i'm inner monologue high
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
