why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
Randomize
