he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
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so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
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I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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