Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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