rhymes with "ouble enetration"
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Randomize
