PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Randomize