Non-Jews are for practice
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Randomize
