you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
