it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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