this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
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