im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
bring money and cleavage
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Randomize
