Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
