We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I am available for nakedness
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
