I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Randomize