problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
