She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize