I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
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