Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
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