Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Randomize
