No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
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