Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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