I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
