I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Randomize
