So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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