That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Randomize
