so explain again why im purple
no
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Randomize
