So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
