Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
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