Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
