I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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