Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize
