He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Randomize
