I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
