so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
