Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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