South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
