I understand Curling. That high.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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