keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
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