I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
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