We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.