he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
