i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
Hippo gnu deer
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize