I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
