you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
