It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
